


Reflections

by telera



Series: Ed and Sam's D/s universe [7]
Category: Tron: Legacy (2010)
Genre: Angst, BDSM, Dom/sub, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-20
Updated: 2013-01-20
Packaged: 2017-11-26 06:10:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/647426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/telera/pseuds/telera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam reflects on his D/s lifestyle with Ed</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reflections

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nhpw](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nhpw/gifts).



> These stories do not follow any chronological order- they can be read independently.

It really is difficult to explain.

 

People think Ed and I are just another normal couple. In many ways, I think we are. We go to work, come back home, have dinner, watch TV together and read a little before going to bed. OK, so Ed doesn't read in bed and I only manage one page before I fall asleep. But that's not the point.

 

The point is, Ed is my Master. I asked him to be. It wasn't anything like asking your boyfriend out or a  _Will-you-marry-me_ kind of situation. Although to certain extent, it was. As I said, it's really difficult to explain.

 

I remember once, when I told someone who I thought was friend about the stuff Ed and I are into. She looked at me in horror and told me I was sick, and that I deserved to be bought and sold as a slave like the thousands of people trapped in human trafficking nets every year.

 

'Jerk' was all Ed had to say about her. But I never forgot that day, that capuccino and the way she never contacted me again. That day I decided never to speak about my life again. It felt like pushing myself into the closet and locking myself in with seven keys. Funny, especially in a world where almost every celebrity comes out during a talk show and receives so much support and attention.

 

Well, at least Ed is here with me. And if it's been hard for me all these years, I can't imagine what's been like for him. Like 'Hey, I'm Edward Dillinger Jr., I like to cane my lovers and get off on it'. If I am sick to them, then Ed is a criminal. But the truth is very different, of course.

 

That's what's so difficult to explain.

 

***

 

I remember that first time, back in CalTech. The guy who was fucking me said: 'Don't cumm, don't cumm just yet. Wait for me, boy, wait...'

 

I never knew what it sounded like for him, but for me it was an order. And following it gave me the best orgasm in my life. That night I realized I didn't want to cumm by myself ever again. I needed someone to own my pleasure, to give me permission. Someone who could control my body in a way I could not.

 

Of course, back then I thought it was just a physical thing. Like flipping a switch, even. But soon I realized it was more than that. Surrendering my body meant surrendering my mind. That scared me, because there were places there I didn't want anybody to see.

 

I convinced myself I would never find someone who'd look inside my head and like what they'd see. Like or even accept. I truly believed it, and resigned myself to a life of loneliness and BDSM ads.

 

Then, one day I dropped a frapuccino on some guy in the Starbucks queue and knelt to clean his trousers up with a napkin as I apologized. And he did nothing. Just waited in silence as I finished. And that moment, I swear. All I wanted was to spend my life  kneeling at his feet. It felt so natural, so right.  _Thank you_ , he said coldly when I was done. I blushed then, and to this day I think Ed saw right through me that very instant. After all, it takes one to know one.

 

And the irony is that Ed not only accepted or liked my darkness, he fed it. And although it took me almost a year, I came to understand there was no darkness at all. Just me, Sam Flynn. A 28 year old. Lonely. Bright. Scared. Just like anybody else, I guess.

 

And it is so liberating, you see, when I'm splayed like a butterfly and naked, babbling and trembling as Ed uses me for hours on end, and I'm just a toy but the most important thing in his life. A dirty, little slut, but his precious lover and companion.  

 

Hard to explain, uh? Well, I'm afraid I did my best.


End file.
